Years ago I would pore over Maxim magazine for articles answer the perplexing question, “How do you know if she’s interested?” These articles would teach you how to recognize when a woman was sending what dorks call “indicators of interest” (or IOIs). ”If she waves her finger through her hair while looking your way, she is interested.”
When talking to guys with high notch counts, though, I noticed (or, rather, failed to notice) something.
Players never say to one another, “Oh, she just looked my way, held eye contact for 3 seconds, and then turned away. I can now see that she is checking me out through the corner of her eye.”
Players see an attractive girl and make the approach, whether she is giving an IOI or not.
When you think deeply about it, looking for an IOI is inherently supplicating. Why do you need a woman’s permission before you approach her?
Men also look for IOIs to minimize the feelings of rejection. By only approaching women sending out strong signals of interest, the man is minimizing the chance he will be rejected.
But guys with high notch counts have all been rejected hundreds of times. Rejection is part of the game. So players don’t need the IOI safety net to catch them from the fall of rejection.
Although knowing body language is useful, players never wait for an IOI.
If you see a girl you like, make a move. If need her to give you an IOI before you’ll approach, you may as well duct tape you dick towards your asshole.
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If I spot a girl I like, I only look for 1 IOI.
Is she breathing? Yes? Perfect, that’s the IOI I’m looking for. Time to go talk to her.
When you have social game IOIs don’t matter because you have the skills to create something out of nothing.
This applies to more than just game. It seems like everyone is just waiting for “something” to do anything they claim to want to do. Fear and complacency.
excellent addition, YH. boldness and overcoming fear, that’s my new theme.
I agree in the real world, you don’t wait for an invitation to approach.
BUT in nightclubs, a virtual reality apart from the real world, IOIs or whatever you want to call them can play into your favour. Of course you can go up and talk to girls out of the blue, but having a powerful first impression and strong eye contact before anything is said between you is very powerful.
If a girl looks at me and smiles or comes and dances next to me as in this pickup: http://3rdmilleniummen.wordpress.com/2012/09/06/field-report-amazonian/
Then it’s an open invitation for me to talk/dance with them. The environments are BUILT for meeting people and hooking up. If they show that interest, It’s mine to screw up. And hanging near someone they find attractive can often be done subconsciously.
A couple of years ago I was in a club with three friends (all female). I made eye contact with a girl on the dance floor, she held it, I waved and she smiled. I took that as an open invitation and I went across to her.
An hour of dancing and making out later, the girls I went back to the girls I was with. They were like “where did you know her from??”
“I don’t”…
“yes you did, she smiled at you across the room!!”
“umm she’s a German backpacker who arrived two days ago”. LoL.
BUT as I said, you’re right Danger and Play in the real world- on the street etc its important to approach and talk to girls first because no way will they be shooting off IOIs before you do.
You need to man up and approach them. “If you see a girl you like, make a move”. Exactly.
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Life is a gamble, some larger than others to be sure but a gamble nonetheless. Every stock or financial instrument doesn’t go the direction you may think or want, every hand or roll of the dice may not go your way, and equally so with rejection. That is not a reason to avoid those games, or the larger Game of Life. You get some you don’t deserve and you don’t get some you do deserve, boo hoo. When in doubt, give it a whirl.
ahah funny i have quiet the inverse happen to me. Being so used to approach girl that did not even know i was around them i kind of get lazy when it comes to the ones that give me hard eye contacts. i’ll wait longer, think it through instead of just approaching straight. I think I take It more seriously when the girl give me IOI. I got a lot to learn.
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When it comes to meeting women, and you get to second guessing yourself about “making a move”.
You need to ask yourself one question…
AM I BEING A PUSS?
IF YOU ARE, QUIT IT NOW!
“MAN THE HELL UP”
MAKE THAT MOVE…
If ya get shot down, stand it like a man and move on.
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